Bezness in Jordan

Love. To feel love and to be loved. This is a constant search-box element for us, humans. Closely intertwined with happiness and shaping our states and moods and existence.

This is also one of the aces up the sleeve of beznessmen. From Morocco to Tunisia and Egypt [provided that tourism still flourishes there], from Ghana and Nigeria to Turkey, it is a phenomenon to openly loathe. And it has also intensified in certain [more touristy, of course] regions of Jordan. I’ve seen it in Petra, Wadi Musa, Aqaba; I’ve heard that it existed in Wadi Rum.  

How does it work?

He’s working in the tourism field: a guide, a receptionist, a divemaster – and the list could go on and on.

You are vulnerable, naïve and/or inexperienced; your appearance and your age are no important elements here. It doesn’t even matter if you have a boyfriend or a husband.

 

He will ‘work’ you because he needs you. You can provide sex, money, and a visa. And these are obviously great advantages to him. He will chat you up on Messenger, WhatsApp, or Skype. Hours and days in a row. He will say the sweetest words that you could think of. He will invent dramas to keep the fire burning and the hot-and-cold game on, so that you fall harder and harder. He loves you, he can’t live without you, he can’t stop thinking of you, he’s never met anyone like you. Your love story will rocket and plummet and head again to new heights: his parents now know of you, he wants to marry you, he wants you to live with him. In Jordan. 

How can you spot your liar?

At the right time, something bad happens between the two of you. Or simply, in his life. His donkey dies, his boss hasn't paid his salary in months, he is in great debt, he needs money to buy a car or a house or to seal some kind of business. And it’s you that he turns to.

An honourable Muslim [and an honourable man, that is] would never ask for money from the woman that he supposedly loves!

Is he thinking about sex right away? Remember that you are involved with a man whose faith actually claims that sex outside marriage is a sin.

What do you know about him: his full name, his date of birth, details about his family? And even if you do, are those real?

What do you talk about? Does he remember details about you? Or do you spend more time chatting about his problems and his miserable existence?

And yes, that excuse that the Internet is not working is a big fat lie; he probably has another victim coming up or an old one over in Jordan!  

How can we end it?

When we meet another human being, we expect him/her to be as kind and as open-hearted as we are. As trustworthy as we are.

Ladies, stop believing in fairytale-love stories that happen overnight. Yes, we can fall in love fast, but it takes years for that feeling to become love, in the truest sense of the word.

A man who loves you will always be there for you, will appreciate you, will support you, will respect you, will never take you for granted, and will never ask for anything from you, but your love! You will be able to reach him at any given time and he won’t expect you to do things if you are not yet ready for them. This should be the case with all the men in the world, but these romantic liars really know how to turn you and your lives upside-down! You will, thus, need strong determination to let him go.

Considering these, stop sending money to that young guy who says that you’re his world, stop filling in his visa applications, and stop giving him your body and your heart to play around!  

End it and break the cycle that you are fuelling!

He will lose and that will simply mean bad bezness.

 

In the end, what goes around comes around. And I’m sure that those narcissists out there will never feel truly happy in their hearts because living a life of illusions is not living at all.

On the other hand, all those women who went through hard times will emerge stronger and more confident, with their life lessons well learnt. And with a smile on their face... which could now defeat any attempt at ordeal, as disguised and as incipient as it may seem.