Fear

‘Fear is a choice.’ was boldly stated back in 2013 as the motto of a movie that did not say much, but these four words stayed with me.

As the last week of my life has been a constant reminder of this destructive feeling, I’m scribbling down some thoughts on it, which may help you or me… and act as a catalyst whenever we feel the need to revisit these lines.

Fear may be a shy thing on certain occasions. Feeling underdressed to attend a certain event, dreading to make a fool of yourself at certain courses/classes because you know that there are high expectations involved, or simply deciding that it is easier to stay in your comfort zone than it is to exit it and accept that invitation or take up that new challenge.

It probably is easier. But you are missing out on some pretty incredible things.

 

You’ve heard these from me before, yet I never gathered them all inside one article. As silly as it may sound, you are the only one shaping your life! There is nobody else calling the shots, you always have a choice, and everything happens because you decided to follow a certain path.

Do you love somebody? Fight for them, let them know that they mean the world to you, don’t just stand there in your box, letting the years go by. The Globe won’t stop spinning just because you’ve got a broken heart.

 

Heal it. And realise, on the other hand, that you’ve also got the greatest power of all in your hands. It is the power of letting go, of freeing yourself. When a person steps into your life, it doesn’t mean that it’s going to be forever. Living in the now and enjoying the beautiful times with a friend who’s so dear to you that imagining life without him/her is torture is a guarantee that you will also enjoy the memories you shared, later on. Even if there’s been a rift between the two of you.

 

I fear things, too. Yet I never feared that I would end up alone. And you know why? Because I told myself many-many years ago that a human who spreads joy and kindness around will never be lonely and miserable. My fears are more physical in nature, yet I (nearly) always decide to go past them. It’s that crazy feeling of having two voices whispering those ‘Don’t do it, you’ll get hurt’ / ‘Just do it, you don’t know what you’re missing’… It’s true: most of the time, those things we fear are just pure imagination. We fear the worst, but realise – if we give into our courage, and not into our fear – that we do hold those skills needed to get us through whatever we are engaging in. The first leap is the most difficult of all: but then you’re on track, finding your line through those rapids, enjoying your freefall, or galloping up that mountain road. It is a rush that can’t really be compared to anything else, because it’s like a pleasant sting in your heart, which reverberates in your entire body. It lasts for only a few seconds, but… boy… you wish to feel it again and again and again. And the search for those seconds of bliss sometimes becomes synonymous to your life path, in a good and non-detached way.

 

The eternal optimist in this body of mine looks at the world, feels that the energies have shifted, but still believes in the Good and in its triumph. ‘Good’ may be a relative term, just like ‘truth’, but if we let ourselves feel it with our heart, we cannot go wrong! Travelling may well be the best thing in your life, that one activity that opens you up the most, leaves you humble, and cuts through the veil of mist and illusion surrounding us all. I see it as a challenge, one of the fairytale types. What do you fear? That there’s a bomb waiting for you in train station x? Do you know how many places we could be in during one single day? Does that mean that there’s a bomb waiting for us in all of those places? Are you horrified at the thought that you might be shot at, robbed, raped? Which are the odds for all of those things to happen? Doesn’t taking a risk – even if it is only in your head, and not a real one – sound better than leading a mediocre existence and playing it always safe? Doesn’t dreaming to get to a place that will forever stay in your heart sound better than having dark thoughts about travelling? Doesn’t experimenting sound better than dismissing a certain destination altogether? Based on what? Rumours? Positive attracts positive. Muddling through does not equal adventure.

 

Why are you afraid to love, to let go, to experience, and to live?

The power to change that lies within. The magic lies ahead.